– When a fielder would stop a ball running to the boundary with his foot, Prof would signal a 4 anyway because that was not the way to stop a ball. I see this all too often in modern day cricket and wonder how many extra boundaries would be awarded under his umpireage.

– When a thrown return fell short or wide of its intended recipient, McKenzie throwing to Curtis for example, Prof would announce: “That’s $10 to Curtis and $20 to be on my desk by sundown McKenzie.” He would often keep a running tally if there were multiple offences, reminding the player exactly how much was owed to whom and by when.

– When a wicketkeeper was foolish enough not to exert himself fully for a catch behind the wicket, Prof would stop the game. He would then get the keeper to lie face down on the field in the direction the ball had travelled past, pick him up by the trousers and shirt and throw him the distance he should have dived if he’d been properly committed to the catch.

Things we learned:

– Never say “Bad luck” to a batsman when dismissed. This would result in yet another classic Prof-ism: “It wasn’t bad luck, it was pure lack of skill!” I still get a lot of mileage out of this expression. So many uses.

– Never answer back (as if I’d have to point this out). After a long afternoon in the sun, I asked if I could go and get something for a headache. Prof explained to me that pain was all in the mind, and I agreed, reminding him I said I had a headache… “Detention Curtis”.

Of all the Prof-isms to be uttered, one stands out to me for sheer randomness and shock value. On Wednesday afternoons the Colts team would line up and Prof would pick two boys to be Captains for the next match. “McKenzie!” he bellowed and Rupert stepped forward, probably feeling honoured to have been selected for the role. Instead, he received the waggling finger. The finger was always pointed down at a recipients nose from an unnatural height on a 45 degree angle, quivering with intent. “How dare you enter my dreams without my permission!” Prof snapped. Total silence. Rupert stepped back and two Captains were chosen.

Prof was indeed a one man institution, and I severely doubt any of the students he was involved with will forget him, ever.